I’ve always loved yoga, but haven’t been committed to it for long enough to really feel its effects. Not flexibility or a deep breath or a strong core – but peace. Real peace. Inner peace. The kind of peace that does not come easy for most of us in the messy, complicated, distanced and overwhelmingly intrusive world we live in.
Getting through (or through so far) a global pandemic has been a transformative experience, to put it lightly and positively. 2020 was many things, ranging from terrifying to impossibly impossible to never-ending to heartbreaking. Owning a small business, especially a relatively new and quickly-growing one, COVID-19 really tested us, our system, our decisions and our plans. Yet despite all that, here we are.
A few months into COVID I realized that I could feel myself changing. The easiest and bluntest way to describe it was fast-paced mental and emotional puberty. It was painful and swift, but I noticed it; I was becoming stronger, smarter, more decisive, and direct. I was becoming less emotionally attached and sensitive and more action-driven and sensible. A great deal of my anxieties and hesitancies were ground out of me by the sheer force and time that only a year-long and historically unprecedented pandemic could bring.
Somewhere along the line, I realized that I was becoming the businesswoman I needed to be; not to just survive COVID, but to take my business to the next level. I still have anxious and fearful moments, but they are few and far between compared to a year ago. Despite the hardships COVID has brought, too, our business has grown – and so have we, both as business owners and as a couple.
Now that I’m ending the second trimester of pregnancy, I feel bold and brave about entering motherhood. I feel as strong and capable and ready as I could ever be, and so does my husband. Now that we’ve gotten this far together and only grown closer, parenting seems like a job we can handle as a united front.
Yoga has been a gigantic help throughout this ordeal – from being locked inside the house with gyms closed to simply being pregnant, it’s become an integral part of my life that I love. It’s helped me detach from myself and connect with everything else, which feels even more important as I welcome a human being into the world and an ever-evolving business back into the workforce.
I came across this quote from Rumi a few days ago and was brought to tears. I thought, I was being polished! I knew it all along.